The Most Interesting Story You Will Ever Read
by IcyRaven73
Summary: This is the most interesting Mortal Kombat parody you will ever read. May contain trace amounts (okay, lots) of OOC. Kitana-centric. (On hiatus until further notice.)
1. Sandal Ruiner!

Note: Shang Tsung, Kitana, and Reptile don't belong to me or my sister. They belong to Netherrealm Studios. My sister and I merely wrote this fanfiction.

One day, Shang Tsung decided that he needed to freshen up his evil lair. So, he went to Kitana's flower garden and killed all the flowers. The flowers that survived the poison were stolen and taken back to his hideout. As Kitana was gathering her gardening supplies, she couldn't help but get the feeling that some moles ate the roots of her flowers. That's when she saw a small trinket on the ground that looked very misplaced. She then put the trinket up only to step in a corrosive green liquid that almost instantly dissolved her sandals. The sandals were given to her by her late parents as a grow-into gift. They were a size 7 and identical to the pair that her mother Sindel always wore. Her father Jerrod told her, "When you get the same age as mommy, you can wear the same kind of shoes she wears,". She was overjoyed the day she tried them on and they fit perfectly. This enraged the princess, who immediately sought out Reptile so she could get an explanation from him as to why he didn't clean up the acid puddle he had made.

"REPTILE!" she yelled. "Yes, madam?" he asked. Would you mind explaining why you left this dis…

And that is the end of the first chapter of the most interesting story you will ever read. This is a warning for those of you who prefer a much darker tone. You will not find much of the blood, gore, and general violence here, for it is a far lighter parody of Mortal Kombat. Those of you who were hoping to read a fanfic that is more faithful to the canon may want to leave now.


	2. One Year Later

Disclaimer: Mortal Kombat is not owned by me. It belongs to the fine folks over at Netherrealm Studios.

(1 year later)...gusting pile of your vomit on the floor? My mother gave me these sandals! Now, they are vomit sandals, you frog!" she proclaimed. Reptile simply looked at the princess in confusion as she yelled at him.

"My mother went all the way to Dollar General to get me these sandals, you slimy salamander!" she continued yelling. Kitana's "twin sister" Mileena peeked her head around the corner and yelled, "DOLLAR GENERAL SUCKS!"

"No, it doesn't," Kitana retaliated. Mileena then pelted Kitana and Reptile with handmade teddy bears before sticking her tongue out, yelling "I'M TELLING DADDY!" and running off. Kitana picked a teddy bear up and formed a brilliant idea! She implanted a camera into the teddy bear's eye and put it on the shelf.

"I WILL CATCH THE SANDAL RUINER NOW!" Kitana yelled. Reptile looked her in the eye.

"I wassssn't in your garden. It issss far too colorful and besidessss, I have a pollen allergy," he calmly stated.

"AVAST!" Kitana yelled for no real reason. Reptile simply walked away in confusion. Kitana then left the room hoping to catch the perpetrator when suddenly...

And that's it for the second chapter of the most interesting story ever. Again, if you prefer the blood, gore, and general violence that is in Mortal Kombat, don't read any further. That's what the Back button on your browser is for.


	3. Midget Man!

Once again, I don't own Mortal Kombat. Netherrealm Studios owns it.

Scorpion was feeling peckish. He picked up the teddy bear and looked it over.

"Nice try, Mileena..." Scorpion flatly said before devouring the teddy bear. Little did he know, however, that Kitana had placed a _Grow Your Own Midget Kit DIY Funtime!_ inside the bear. Scorpion began to feel sick. He passed out, woke up hours later, and had a strange feeling. It was when he looked in the mirror that he knew something was different. He felt strange, powerful, and he no longer needed his glasses, for he was Midget Man! (Spiderman theme plays, except all instances of spider are replaced with midget.) He was the size of a full grown man but he had all the powers of a midget! But that story's boring, so let's get back to the sandal mystery.


	4. Shang Tsung's Room

Disclaimer: My sister and I do not own Mortal Kombat.

Anyway, things are starting to get even more interesting in this tale.

Kitana peeked into Shang Tsung's room to discover that the sorcerer had taken up floral artistry. On his shelves, she noticed that he had been collecting bottles of Reptile's acid. She thought nothing of it and crept into his room to search for his diary. According to a recent conversation she heard between Daegon and Mavado, he kept the diary locked up in a Justin Bieber lunchbox which was kept in his One Direction backpack, which was locked in a Miley Cyrus safe that was in a hole that was covered up by a Jonas Brothers poster signed by Big Time Rush. Kitana sighed, cracked her knuckles, and set to work.

Kitana carefully took down the poster. She took several (actually two) guesses to crack the safe. Her second guess, Zach and Cody, was the password needed to get into the safe. She then removed the backpack from the safe and unzipped it.

"This is so simple. I figured he wouldn't be the sort to spill his secrets to random passerby," she thought. She then removed the lunchbox from the backpack and was preparing to open it when she froze in place.

And thus ends the fourth chapter of this rather interesting story. Kitana is rather oblivious to very obvious hints. That dense princess...


End file.
